Peace of Mind When your Thoughts are a Jumbled Mess

Everyday I think of things I’d like to write, to ponder, then I sit at my computer and watch the cursor blink repetitively. The page is blank and the expectations are high. My thoughts escape me as fast as they arrived. It’s myself that holds me back and demands more than can be accomplished. My mind suddenly revolts and my fingers won’t move. So, I’m starting with this, an admission that I can’t necessarily do this, but I’m going to do it anyway.

I will write SOMETHING. I’m going to think this through, reflect and figure something out. It’s a start and a step in the direction I would like to go.

Life truly has so many hardships, so many disappointments. The longer we live, the more they build. Everyone knows this once they’ve lived a while. We carry it all like a weight upon our shoulders. We have so much to do, so much to decide. We trudge through it all and collapse into bed at night as our minds race through the tasks for the following days. We cruelly remind ourselves over and over that we should be free and that our days should represent peace, kindness and love. We know it doesn’t have to be this way, but how do we dig out of the mess in our minds? Our hopes and dreams seem like they should be given up, because they don’t seem attainable any longer. Our souls long for quiet, thoughtful moments, but our minds relinquish those things. Demands, clutter and confusion completely devour us, and we let them.

Today, all I need to know is that is doesn’t have to be this way. This is my beginning. I breathe deeply, taking in the prospect of a new way of living, a new way of feeling.

We find in the Bible that Habakkuk was very overcome on all sides. Discouraging situations were building up around him. When I read his words, I can relate to my own disgruntlement, my own frustrations. However, he looks at these problems in a different way than I do most days.

Habakkuk says, “I will stand at my watch and station myself on the ramparts; I will look to see what he will say to me, and what answer I am to give to this complaint.” Habakkuk 2:1

Habakkuk is looking and listening. He has hope in the fact that this isn’t the way it will always be. This is where I so often go wrong. Habakkuk sees a problem and he goes to God. I do that. I go to God over and over, but I often don’t listen and watch for the reply. I don’t feel for the subtle movements in my soul. Habakkuk is so sure that God has an answer that he doesn’t even consider it hopeless. God tells him to write it down, so it will be a testimony for the future.

Write down the vision (or revelation), clearly write it down so one may easily read it. For the vision is yet for the appointed time; it testifies about the end and it will not lie. Though it delays, wait for it, since it will certainly come and not be late.” Habakkuk 2: 2-3

So, this is me writing it down today, here for the world to see. My “vision” from the Lord is simply a picture what a life of peace would look and feel like. It’s my desire for it. Its hard to imagine getting there, but I know it would be a very good thing. I know that I would feel closer to God and that I would feel better. I know that life would slow down and my mind would settle. I would see God in more things. Because this vision of my life lines up with the Bible, and because it is a righteous desire, I know that it is from God. We often think revelations or visions must be big things, but mostly they aren’t. Mostly, they regard the small, everyday happenings.

The Lord gives peace to his people, the Lord blesses his people with peace.” Psalm 29:11

It’s out there, this peace Psalm 29 talks discusses. But, where do we find it? It’s attainability is absolutely not impossible, or else the Bible would be untrue. We each have our own pathway though. My intuition tells me that all of us should watch and listen like Habakkuk once did. “I will look to see what He will say to me…” Start slowly. Just listen. Listen to your heart & soul and discover what God may be asking of you, what revelation he may be trying to give you. Write it down and try to clearly decipher one thought from another, your own selfish thoughts from those directed by God.

Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase, just take the first step.” Martin Luther King Jr.

Don’t be overwhelmed by the whole picture. Even Martin Luther King Jr. knew this concept well as he tackled some of the greatest challenges in history.

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